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DOES LOVE COUNT ON THE TENNIS COURT?

Nancy

Morgan

With this month hosting Valentine's Day, it seemed the perfect time to examine the love-hate relationship sometimes exhibited on the tennis courts when married couples partner for mixed doubles.

Bellaonline.com writer Sandra Eggers, in her article, "Mixed Troubles - Surviving Doubles with Your Spouse," offers several tips for survival, including communicating both strategy and encouragement, treating your partner with respect and remembering that nobody's flawless. So, don't expect perfection! Top on her list of tips is to have fun and place no unreasonable expectations on each other.

The mixed doubles format is found in social, league and professional tournament events. In 1887, the U.S. Open was the first grand slam tournament to offer mixed competition, followed by Wimbledon in 1913, Australian 1922 and French 1925. Only Margaret Court and Ken Fletcher have won all four grand slam events in the same year (1963).

The USTA introduced mixed leagues in 1999 and had almost 60,000 players. Ten years later, a 41% growth resulted in over 100,000 players. Last year, Florida had over 7000 players and the Pinellas league almost 500.

"What we have observed for Mixed Leagues is that most teams are very family oriented since you can have a 1.0 NTRP difference between partners," said Jodi Manning, USTA Florida's mixed league coordinator. "Many husband/wives, father/daughter or mother/son teams play together, and if not together, at least they can be on the same team.
"It seems to be our most social, easy going group at the section events, even though they are competing to a National championship. We feel this contributes to the popularity of the program."

Jodi Manning

Shane/Allison

   Randomly selected local married mixed doubles pairs revealed some interesting tips of their own on how to best "survive mixed with your spouse." Read on!
Allyson and Shane Talbert didn't meet on the tennis court, but their second date included tennis.
   "The most fun for us is rooting for each other and being proud of your partner's winning shots," said Allyson. "Always assume your partner is trying their hardest and the ultimate win is having fun and a positive experience."
   Allyson says she usually sets up the matches and then Shane is in charge, although his easy-going manner has made playing mixed always fun.

"Some of our best fun was laughing and eating all weekend in Daytona last July with a wonderful Largo mixed 7.0 team."

   Mary Halliday said her mixed doubles experience was smooth, especially when she and Dave started playing three years ago, because tennis was so new to her.
   "Dave taught tennis 32 years, some at a community college in Jacksonville, so it was strictly fun with no competition," said Mary. "We met a lot of couples through tennis and had a Friday Date Night Out with tennis."
   The two started Largo's 7.0 mixed team and then expectations increased, said Mary. With NTRP rating changes this year, however, the Hallidays are back to mixed drop-in and club socials.

"Don't instruct or criticize each other on the court after every missed point - just play and have fun - work on the weak areas while practicing together."

Dave / Mary

Jaye / Dave

   Jaye and Dave Brown's advice to married couples playing mixed is simple: what happens on the tennis court, stays on the tennis court!
This philosophy has worked well for the East Lake Woodland's members since they began playing together 15 years ago while living in Pensacola.
   "Our local club had a round robin mixed doubles on Sunday afternoons and a play room for our three young children, so that's how we started," said Jaye. "Our biggest challenge is my patience when he tries to give me advice, even though he doesn't like to get advice. The best part is when other tennis couples everywhere congratulate us for being able to play together."
   The Browns play socially, USTA leagues and club mixed.

"The most fun part of playing together is when we are both are playing well, hitting those shots and working well together on the court, " said Dave. "Try to remember that playing with your spouse can be challenging, because you have to remember that no matter what happens on the court, you are still committed to the other person.... Remember, they don't TRY to miss any shots, so on the court and after the match you have treat them like a partner you aren't married to!"

Traveling to compete in mixed doubles tournaments and meeting new people intrigue Judy and Pat Siracusa, who started playing together in 1998.
"We are both competitive, so losing is no fun," said Pat. "The most fun is playing well and winning. Try playing and see if you have fun. If it gets too intense, don't do it! The marriage is more important than tennis."

"We advised our son Brian and his tennis teaching pro wife Jen not to play together because they are both good and both competitive. We said 'Guys, we are the only couple we know that plays together and stays together.' They said they could do it also, but about six months later, they quit. They are still happily married with three children!"

Pat / Judy

Mari / Rick
2009 45s Husband-Wife State Champions

Mari and Rick Workman have played mixed doubles 32 years - most of their married life. Mari credits Rick setting the best example of playing hard, playing fair, learning from losses and being a gracious winner or loser. Most importantly, said Mari, mixed doubles must be fun!

"Never, never, NEVER communicate in a negative or sarcastic manner, and that includes body language as well as words."

   Fairly newlyweds Judi and Dale Alford look to the Siracusas as their role models when it comes to mixed doubles and hope they will play for many years having fun and being successful.
   "We met on the tennis court at one of Frenchy's tournaments and then again when she came to Royal Racquet to hit with the boys," said Dale. "Judi and Grahame Bell used to play mixed together and were quite successful, but in the last year we've begun playing together. Judi plays the deuce court and we are both very competitive. She's great at game strategy."
   Last year, the duo won the USTA Florida Mixed Doubles 35-and-under State Title.

"Go play, have FUN and enjoy each other. At the end of the day, it's just tennis, not anything more."

Judi / Dale, Henman Hill at 2008 Wimbledon

Jeff / Ann

Ann and Jeff Winkler had played recreational tennis for years, but not until their daughter went off to college in the fall of 2007 did they combat the empty nest syndrome by tackling more competitive play. Since then, the two have won the 2008 USTA Florida Mixed 8.5 State Championship and the 2009 Florida Tennis Cup Mixed 100. The high school sweethearts from Detroit reached the quarterfinal round in the 2008 USTA National Husband Wife 100 Grass Court Championship and finished fifth in last year's National Husband Wife 100 Clay Courts. Jeff, a former college player, has long been top-ranked in state play and has represented the USA in international competition.
"Jeff makes strategy decisions on the court because he has much more match experience and is a much better player," said Ann. "My duty is to keep the ball in play - it's his job to figure out how to win the match."

"Have fun; compete to win, but enjoy the matches and each other's company."

   Janice Stone and Tony Ruggiero met because of tennis and have partnered 34 years. Before moving from New Jersey to Florida in 1998, the two not only played mixed doubles together, but also became certified teaching pros and worked in the tennis business. Janice, cousin to former professional Mel Purcell, once directed a junior program with 200 juniors at the club.
   "When I met Janice she was playing on an indoor court at a club where I was working part-time," said Tony. "At 29, I decided tennis was something I could do, even though my background was in basketball and baseball. That really kicked off everything else."
   The two were among the top mixed doubles teams in the USTA Mid-Atlantic section, and when coming to Florida continued their competitive play. Next month, they will compete in the Florida Tennis Cup Championships.
"Our advice to other tennis partnerships is if it's not fun, don't do it." said Janice. "Life is too precious to suffer any major disagreements on the court."


Janice & Tony (70's)	Janice & Tony (now)

Dr. Nishin Tambay, one of 13 physicians with Orthopaedic Associates of Florida (and one of this newsletter's sponsors) offers the following advice in "Love and Forgive Your Partner."

DOES LOVE COUNT ON THE TENNIS COURT? LOVE MEANS EVERYTHING ON THE TENNIS COURT!